life out of balance

i am feeling a little overdrawn lately (in the Dr Phil emotional sense of the word)

with a little too time spent doing unto everyone else and no unto myself (see my hair for example)

giving and not receiving anything to show for it

i hate that idea that you give in order to receive

and i do love to give to others and do so unconditionally too

but sometimes i just end up wondering why i bothered

and if i'm thoughtful or just plain stupid

i hate quotes, but......

the beatles did say 'the love you take is equal to the love you make'

so even stoned, they knew that mutual give and take was essential

i just don't want to wait till 'the end' to balance my emotional checkbook

i need balance and harmony today!!

i need fairness and equality always - all people to feel equally validated and worthwhile

ho hum

it's not a personal thing

just an overall 'ho hum' about life right now

the song 'you're so vain' bugs me relentlessly

because it seems like it would be totally vain to not think the song is about you if you know the writer

in other news i've decided that the buffet of buffets is a very bad idea

nothing makes you feel as bad as SEVEN mediocre buffets

and if i had that cotton candy maker i'd never really have any reason to go to planet hollywood again...

since cotton candy is all they have that i like

but it does mean i NEEEED a cotton candy maker - stat :)

off to school... and maybe other places.

back later xoxo