shameful confessions (that i'm not really ashamed of...)

i haven't been to real life confession since about 1982 ;)

i always made up the acceptable white lies i confessed to anyway ;) 

i never said the hail marys afterwards either ;)

i can't make eye contact (and definitely not ear contact) with people who have torn earlobes (even typing that makes me ill)

i don't flush public toilets with my foot ever - i think it's so lame and germophobic (and to prove it, i never get sick ;)

i won't waste my calories on broken alphabet cookies :(

i wish horrible things upon people who don't take two seconds to hold the door for me

i think Mitt Romney is really gross and even if he was a democrat i still wouldn't vote for him because he is not a charming man

i hate that robotic amphibian Ann Romney even more than Mitt ;)

i would never, no how, no matter how pretty the scenery, no matter how storybook the house, live in a red state :| 

i can't stand that nose snort that (certain) men do - it should be grounds for murder

i don't like Chicago (except the bean, which i love)

i think Portia de Rossi is not nearly good enough for sweet Ellen :(

i never buy anything organic - i think it's ungrateful and pointless and i think Whole Foods is the biggest waste of money ever (in my opinion ;)

i will never buy henley shirts

i never donate a dollar at the checkout

i say fuck waaaaaaay too often :|  i only wish i could blame tourrettes....

i instantly fell in love with Barack knowing that he says fuck waaaaaay too often also :)

i have a map on my phone and on my computer and in my car of every star's home in L.A. and even though i try really hard to respect their privacy, i just can't ;)